Welcome to the first ControverSunday of 2011! New to ControverSunday? Check out its home page to get the low-down. And then join us! New contributors are always welcome. Always.
This month’s topic is, appropriately, about resolutions. It’s a pretty open topic this month. Essentially if you are talking resolutions then you are in! Here is the recap of the suggested questions:
“What is it about the way you parent or the way you take care of your self that you want to change or work on this year? What are your resolutions for you or for your kids. What have your challenges been? How will you accomplish them? Why do you want to accomplish them?
Do you think New Years resolutions work? Are they reasonable or realistic? Can we start fresh in the New Year? Can we make big shifts in how we do things? What does it take to do this?”
Good Enough Mum
Our Lady of Perpetual Bread Crumbs (noticed it’s not linked yet. mmeperpetua has asked for an extension. If there is no post by Friday let’s all head over to her blog and heckle her.)
Now You’re In the World
Sometimes you can change things and sometimes you can’t.
2010 has been rough, y’all. Not as rough as a lot of other people, I still count myself as very very fortunate. But in the context of my life, it has been one of the hardest years yet. I am happy to say goodbye to 2010. That’s not to say there haven’t been some really wonderful things about this year (my kid is really cute and hilarious! and I love that I started writing this blog–it has been a major source of happiness for me. Oh and I got a new ‘professional’ job!), but there have been many tough things too. Many of them I have written about, some of them I haven’t (and won’t).
There are somethings about my life as it is right now that I can’t change. Like really. I can’t. I can do things to try and make it better and easier, but when push comes to shove I don’t control everything. (As much as maybe I would like to).
So when it comes to resolutions, maybe I should set some and work towards the things I can change.
I don’t have any resolutions for the kid or as a parent. I am pretty happy with how I parent and I think Audrey is doing great. Sure I would like to try and stay calm and not get frustrated as quickly… and you know, generally be a better parent because there is always room for improvement. But not resolutions making stuff.
If I were to set a resolution it would be personal. For me, two things come to mind. The weight and the anxiety. I need to deal with both. I still haven’t gotten up the guts to call one of the couple of recommendations for someone to help me with my anxiety. I need to do this pronto.
When it comes to my weight… honestly, I don’t know what to do. I have lost significant weight before. It was hard. Really really hard. I didn’t have a kid and I had a deadline- my wedding in June ’08. I was motivated and I had the time to dedicate to it. We had the money to buy an elliptical (which we had to sell when we moved because it didn’t fit down the stairs in our new place). Now I know what they say. They say there is always time, you can make the time. You can make the time for you. And that is true. But that time does have to come from somewhere. From my blogging time, my knitting time, my sleeping time, my time playing with my toddler, my time with my husband, my cooking/baking time, my cleaning time, my something time. I have to make it priority and to make it a priority I need to give something up.
And I live in a city with winter 8 months out of the year. Which means I also need money to make exercise happen. Scratch that, I want to exercise indoors because I am a whimp and not likely to go for an outdoor run in the bloody cold. So money to go to the gym or the pool or something. Which I guess could come out of our wine budget (don’t tell my husband I said that. )
It is possible. I could do it. But if I am honest with myself, I don’t really want to. Not right now. Not with so much else going on. I feel a bit like I am in survival mode, just trying to get by.
I know resolutions are not suppose to be easy. But when are they realistic? So many people set resolutions and then don’t stick with them. The gyms are packed to the brim in January, and then fade away to empty by March. So does it make sense to set a resolution, even one I know I really should do, if I know chances are I am not going to stick to it? Is there value in setting one for the sake of setting it? Does setting a resolution that you know you are likely not going to keep do more harm then good? Is it okay to say, this year, my resolution is just to keep going and try to keep my sanity in the process?
Or maybe I need something. Something I can do. Something I can change. Maybe I need to accomplish something and use that to build upon.
I really don’t know.
I know we all feel we *should* do this resolution thing. Or at the very least reflect. But why? Because we changed the page on the calendar?
I know, I am being very cynical about this whole thing. I guess I am just not feeling really resolution-ish. I think we do resolutions because there is something about a new year that feels like a clean slate. Like we can be and do anything we want. We are starting fresh. New Years is energizing and reflective. But friends, I just don’t feel energized this New Years. I feel run down and worn out. Not exactly the right frame of mind for a successful resolution.
So my resolution is to make a resolution when I feel energized, fresh and new again.